Boxing

When i was a young lad my brother and I wanted to box. I had gotten a punching bag for christmas, to work on my figure, and with it came 2 boxing gloves. So we set up a mattress, and each took one glove. I was literally 2 feet shorter than him, but something inside me thought that each time I could take him. I would try and throw the first punch, and soon after I would get punched literally about 10 times. I would curl up on the ground, and cry and yell stop stop stop. When he would stop I would get back up really quickly, and then cheap shot him. After I cheap shotted him, I would run downstairs, and yell mom mom charles hit me. I would get him in trouble. That's awesome. Now he always tells me how mad he would get, and I laugh and laugh, and then sometimes cry because of how bad my head would hurt afterwards.

to sum things up fighting sucks, and I never have actually punched someone beside my brother in the nards.

this is perfect because I just got asked to participate in ultimate fighting. I said YES.

i need the money

...and the fame

......hi lacy

My Fear of Aliens

tonight, i was hit with a scary truth from my past.

today was a beautiful day, the sun was shining the wind was blowing...i looked better that ever on this fine young sunday...for crying out loud it was park day.

towards the end of the night i heard a haunting word...ALIENS.

it instantly put me in a bad mood, and now fear not america i christian warne am here to blog about it.

it all started way back in 1996 when a movie title Independence Day came out. my parents being the incredible parents that they are took me to go see this movie...keep in mind that i was 10 when this movie came out. i thought that this was the scariest movie, so I cried and cried in the movie theatre and my parents took me from the theatre because they couldn't handle a kid crying...my brother and bruce [my father] stayed and watch will smith and jeff goldblum save america. where did this fear come from? why was I so scared of an alien that you say a total of only 4 times in the move? I think it was because i felt threatened. there isn't suppose to be another life force out there...but after seeing transformers I am convinced that there is!

the next story was when a seriously terrible movie came out title MARS ATTACKS. I think I am so afraid of aliens because this is and was the worst movie i have ever seen. i've got and idea...that get 30 big named actors, and make a terrible movie, that will scare the crap right out of a young child name christian warne [that was the exact conversations the writers had with each other.] While i was in the movie theatre I cried and cried so hard until i fell asleep right before martin short got his finger cut off. which by the was martin short is not a big named actor. i would rather have the kid that played goldberg in mighty ducks than martin short. any who i was terrified yet again of aliens.

the last time was when Men in Black came into our world. the first 5 minutes of the movie freaked me out so bad that i ran out of the theatre screaming. i then ran into the movie hercules playing in the theatre next door, and was happier that I had ever been. to this day I have hercules to thank for my incredible abs. thanks you kevin sorbo..or whoever was the voice of that hercules.

so in terms that you can understand alien freak me out...always have. I don't know the exact cause of it, but if any of you know me very well at all i would never walk out of a movie theatre under any circumstance...unless you put crap like master and commander with russell crow.

i watch independence day every july 4th since 1999, and i still get freaked out. this is a genuine concern of mine. i truly believe that will smith is the greatest man alive...why because he has save us from aliens 3 times. its probably all in my head...oh well I am done thinking about it.

does any one still watch the price is right? drew carey sucks!

Twinkie

for some reason i needed to write about twinkies. today I was driving down from boulder creek, and needed some gas. i stopped in the gas station to use the bathroom, and to my surprise was a twinkie right next to the counter. it instantly brought back memories from when i was younger and full on dreams. i usually see twinkies all the time, but never buy them...i am going to be in the iron man this year so I need to slim down. yeah right iron man...gosh I seriously think I am funny. anyways back to twinkies...
as a kid the name Christian is a tough one to have because everyone wants to change it chris...seriously my name is not christopher its christian, and if you call me chris I will kill you...i'm serious...ask the three people that have said chris...oh wait!!! they are dead. ok so in third grade i really wanted a nickname because people were calling me chris all the time so I wanted to give myself the nickname twinkie. i signed every paper with twinkie, when teachers would ask do you have a nickname I would say...uhh yeah its twinkie.

...it never stuck

...then I tried to resurrect it, and guess what...one person calls me it today...erica stubblefield...i think she is making fun of me, but then again with a name like twinkie i think your bound to get made fun of once or twice

i ate twinkies by splitting them in half hod dog style and licked the cream out then ate the bread. i used to eat one every day after school, and i was angry when a couple of years ago I found out the hostess made two twinkies in one pack. i was angry because that whole time i could have been eating two of them

so in conclusion "don't put twinkies on your pizza." [roy]

Baha Men

as you can tell by now i am not the best at keeping my blog current. but anyways here we go. one thing you need to know about me is that I don't care about grammer and spelling so I apologize about that. anyways here it goes.

growing up i was a really into the current hippest music like shaggy, or lou bega, or cherry poppin daddies, but i believe that the greatest band of my time, was the Baha Men. these 3 men made for one seriously incredible band. I know you are thinking that i am an idiot to like this band, but honestly i fell in love with this band due to the fact that they rocked my motha freaking socks off in concert. I went to go see o-town on tour a couple years back, and the first person to hit the stage was a very young john mayer. he sucked...still does. then came up a favorite of mine o-town, now they truly were great, but nothing could have prepared me for what was about to happen next. 98 degrees came onto the stage, and were seriously good too, but quickly announced that up next was the baha men. the part that you don't know is that for these 3 bands I was sitting in the nose bleed seats, and couldn't really see that well. i was about to leave the show before the baha men came on, but I was approached by a nice man who gave me and my friend a ticket to watch the show from the floor. obviously i went and I was not sorry at all. first baha men opened with WHO LET THE DOGS OUT...then played some crap...the closed with WHO LET THE DOGS OUT. in all my years since, no band has ever EVER done this. this to me was quite simply the greatest thing a band could do...open and close with the same song...the same song that made this band in my eyes one of the greatest bands of the 90's. also the baha men will go down in my book as the band with the best one hit wonder. people will be singing that song forever, and it will never get old. with a chorus like who let the dogs out woof woof woof, you can't go wrong...NO you seriously can't go wrong. i hope these 3 men know what they have done for the world...they have given us hope, and the ability to believe in our dreams.